The truth, hopefully

[Jordan Maxwell]

After speaking to Lars Jordan had started some meat loaf in he oven and went to to find Dru. She had checked every area and finally decided that she had to be in her room. Where was this going? She wasn't sure. Everything had become so complicated and she wasn't sure how to handle it. Everything with Lars and now she was sure she was going to be talking to Dru about the other night. Had Jordan pushed everything to far? Had she made a mistake? Was Dru now upset by everything that happed?

Jordan wasn't sure. She didn't know and she wasn't convinced that she wanted to know. She knocked on the door three times as a thought ran through her head. 'The only night I didn't have nightmares was in her arms.'

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru had stayed in her room after leaving the engine room, there was little reason to leave it. It might make her easier for Jordan to find once she was finished with whatever else she was doing. Time passed slowly, allowing Dru's mind to wander and process. Though really nothing still was clear after all of that.

The mercenary had began to think that Jordan had decided against coming to talk to her. Which was a clear indication of where things would go from there. Fast track to nowhere. She sighed, both frustrated and relieved. Her emotions were conflicted in a big way, but if Jordan didn't want anything further; well it made things easier.

She had been lost in her thoughts when the knocking occurred, which caused her to jump a little. Dru pulled herself from her bed and slowly walked to the door. She was nervous. Her, a stone cold killer, nervous about a mechanic. What a laugh. "Hey." She greeted Jordan once the door was open, moving aside a bit to let her in. If she wanted that is. "Come in if you like. I was begging to wonder if you were going to stop by at all." Dru tried to offer a slight smile, but it was a little clear she was not her normal self. The nerves had settled into her and it showed a little.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan nodded and entered slowly, she wasn't sure what they were going to say and do, she felt like a school girl again. Just like she had when she had a crush on April Kosel or Stephen Walker, but that wasn't worth thinking about now. She had something else happening, though she wasn't sure how either of them were going to handle it. They were both nervous. The nervousness showed on the Mechanic's face. She brought her hands to her hair and started playing with it instantly. She had a large clump of it in her hands and she ran her hands over it, trying to sooth herself.

"I wondered it myself, Dru, I.... I didn't want to upset you if I came, and I didn't want to upset you for not commin'. I, just didn't know what you would want and I don't want to upset you." Her eyes looked away from Dru's, she wasn't sure what to do or say. She felt as though she had placed her foot in her mouth. No, there was more than that, she felt as though she had done something unspeakably, almost evil, to Dru. She did something with out her permission and it had affected them both greatly. She had already decided going in that this talk was going to be more of a 'never again' talk instead of as 'well, I feel the same way about you.'

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Drusilla watched jordan as she walked into her room, obvious that they were both feeling the tension of nerves between them. She wasn't sure if that was a good or bad sign of how this discussion was going to go. It was a fifty-fifty chance on the direction though, odds weren't too bad as far as strictly numbers. A questioning brow raised at the mechanic's words. "I think you worry too much." Dru sighed a little, unsure how to begin.

The mercenary had never been one for small talk or idle chit-chat, why start now. Just get it all out there, get it over with if things weren't going to go well. Easier to just move on rather than dance back and forth right? Dru walked closer to jordan, placing a hand on her shoulder softly, trying to get the mechanic to look at her. "I won't keep you any longer than you want, ill jut get right to it..' her eyes searched jordan's a moment, 'was the other night a mistake to you..? A one time thing? Or is there going to be anything to it.." her voice trailed off. Dru's expression didn't change much as she waited now, unable to clearly hope for one way or the other.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan looked up at Dru. She wasn't sure what to say, today has been an interesting day. She cried and was kissed by Trace, she yelled and screamed at the Cap'n, she, well, everything was getting very emotional on the ship and she wasn't sure how much more she could take. "It wasn't a mistake for me, but I understand if you feel that way. I, I was reacting to feelings and I wasn't thinking.." She gazed up into Dru's eyes. "I don't want it to be only one night Dru, I want something more, but I understand if you don't."

She reached up and touched Dru's cheek softly just looking into her eyes, trying to read her.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru's emotions took a hit with jordan's words. Still mixed up it was becoming a fluster inside of her, but there was definitely relief in there. She leaned her cheek into jordan's hand slightly and looked at her a moment. Well gorram now what did she do? "Truthfully I hadn't expected that to be your response, I was more prepared for you not to say that."

Grinning very lightly she tried to continue, her nerves still showing. "I surely can't guarantee you anything jordan, but as far as this..situation..I would like to see if something more could work." Dru took hold of the mechanic's hand that had been touching her and kept hold of it. "You have to be sure though, because I didn't say that lightly nor easily. My life has never allowed me the luxury to have someone close for very long."

That was one thing that was on her mind, being close to the mercenary would possibly put her in danger, if not now eventually. Just because it was who dru was, a killer for hire and jordan might very well become her weakness.

[Jordan Maxwell]

"I don't think of it was a situation..." She paused and looked up into Dru's eyes. "I really like you Dru, you make me feel safe, and there is more to it than that. I feel like you understand me in a way that no one else can.. I guess that doesn't make senes. When I was on the plant, I spent so much time hiding myself and it jsut feels like everything is bubbling up today." She pulled away from Dru and sat on her bed and looked up into the woman's eyes. "Between the Cap'n and Trace I have been getting really confused Dru. Not about how I feel about you, but just in general...." She was starting to feel like something was wrong with her, perhaps there was. She was on such a thin knife lately, she felt like she was being split into two different people.

"I don't know how to handle relationships very well Dru.. I know I want to see if there is more... I'm not sure what more is but... What do you want?" She asked finally looking up at her.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru listened carefully as jordan spoke, the mercenary didn't see like the only one who was a mess on the inside right now. She smiled softly as jordan tried to explain herself, causing a slight blush on the hard woman's cheeks. When she pulled away drusilla let her, not wanting to force anything. That wouldn't do anything beneficial to the situation.

Keeping her eyes locked onto the mechanic's she nodded slightly, "if there is any doubt in your mind where you and I are concerned, well I think that is normal for people like us who have a hard time with any sort of relationship. I would be lieing to you if I told you I was sure about everything, and I don't lie so here it is..' Dru stayed on her feet, but let herself pace a little nervously as she began. 'it would of course be easier for me being the kind of person I am to forget about the other night, or push it aside at least. Really though I don't want to, but that is what I was prepared to do when you knocked on my door."

Dru wanted to sit next to jordan, but was hesitant. Fearing of overwhelming the woman any futher than she already seemed to be. She let a small grin cross her lips, "Where Lars and Trace are concerned, you need me to go punch either of them for you?" a small attempt to lighten the atmosphere and maybe let jordan feel a bit better in the process.

[Jordan Maxwell]

She smiled and leaned on Dru, this time understanding what she was doing, she wasn't planning on repeating the same mistakes. "Maybe Trace, we have been having a hard time talking, but Cap'n might need one too, we got into a fight a little eariler.. Nah, I suppose they are fine. No punching required."

She moved to look up at Dru then hugged her close. "Dru, I know.. um... Can I stay with you tonight? I'm still not sleeping well.." Her nightmares had been getting worse since leaving Dru's bed. Dru grounded her it seemed. She needed Dru inorder to function at night. Dru would protect her from harm, and more than that. She believed if Reavers boarded, Dru would kill her if it came down to that, not to mention, she would help her survive.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru smiled a little as Jordan leaned on her and told her a bit about what had been going on. It made the mercenary a bit curious as to what happened, "What did the two of you fight about?" She had her own run-ins with Lars before, to her the man was a stubborn man who was full of himself.

When Jordan hugged her, she returned the embrace lightly. She gave the woman a sympathetic look at her question. "Of course you can, anytime you need or want to.." Drusilla brushed her lips lightly on Jordan's forehead. She was surprised on how well this conversation had actually been going so far. It warmed her to think that she might actually learn how to be close to someone, hold them close to her heart and such at some point.

"As far as a relationship goes, I think it would be a learning process for both of us. If you're sure about that decision." This time Dru's voice was a soft whisper.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan sighed. "Cap'n said something about the Alliance, and I threw a cup at him. We yelled and I told him almost everything, and then I had another cry..... I've been doing that a lot today.." She looked up at Dru trying to smile a little but failing. "And then Trace came over, and for the second time today, he kissed me, I am still not sure where that is comming from. I set him stright about it though.." She looked away from Dru, she was rambling now, she was blushing and was realizing she should stop talking, she just didn't know how.

"Then I went to see the Doctor really fast, to check on Munchie.. And he said I shouldn't take sleeping pills, which lead to me asking you about staying here. I can't take the nightmares much longer.. They, they are really getting to me..." She rubbed her hands together almost like she was trying to get something off of them. "Well, then Trace came in, he hurt his hand, and I came stright here, which I should have just skipped everyone else and came here first, but, well, I guess being here with you is a wonderful way to make everything else better... I don't know if that last bit made much sense but....." She trailed off and looked up at Dru again, she was trying to stop talking but when she was nervous she often rambled onward. Now she was struggling to hold it all in.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Of course things never stayed blissful for very long, it was the way of things. Trace had kissed her? Twice? Dru fought the urge to pull away from Jordan, but it was hard. She let the mechanic finish speaking, or rambling in her case. "Are you sure you aren't interested in Trace? However this goes I don't want you to be unsure later." Dru wasn't sure how to feel about the situation, it was all very new and yet still getting complicated quickly or so it seemed.

"Like I said though, you're welcome to stay here as often as you'd like." Drusilla reassured her again about staying with her.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan sat up some and looked directly into Dru's eyes. She wasn't one for words sometimes, sometimes she was. She supposed that depended on the master writer in her head. But in a situation like this, well, how was that suppose to work?

"Dru, I'm here because I want to be with you, not him." She touched Dru's face lightly as she looked into her eyes. "I, I really like you Dru," well partly she had to admit, it was a huge crush, and on the verge of her telling the woman she loved her, but she didn't want to get into that, and the thought made her blush. "I don't like Trace in that way, I kinda see him like a brother, and I don't know where he got those ideas you know? It can't be because i'm not to him.. I'm nice to everyone, cept the Cap'n but that's different." She smiled trying to tease a little but the words only caused her to blush more.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru waited almost impatiently for Jordan to respond about Trace, truth was there was some worry in her mind about it. She had never put herself out there like this, the uneasy and insecurity of it all she wasn't enjoying.

A smile did appear when the mechanic began to talk though, expressing her desire to be with Drusilla instead of Trace. Some relief ran through the mercenary with that news.

She really didn't know what to say in response, Dru was never one to share feelings and the like. "I'm glad Jordan." That would work right? It would have to, at least for now. After a moment she also leaned into Jordan, pressing her lips softly against the other woman's. An oddly soft moment for such a cold hearted mercenary.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan returned Dru's kiss as the small mechanic's hand moved to touch the woman's cheek. The moment their lips touched, if there had been any doubts of what she had said, they vanished in a wave of emotion. No, she made the right choice, no one else made her feel this way.

"I... Thank you Dru..." She wasn't sure what the right words were for a situation such as theirs, nothing could have prepared her for a relationship such as theirs. It wasn't the fact that Dru was a woman that was making her nervous, it was the feelings that went along with Dru. The safty and what she could only assume was the feeling of love.

"What's next Dru? I'm not completely sure what to do."