Nightmares and Curiosity

[Jordan Maxwell]

[January 12, 2523: Early Morning, About 3 A.M.]

Jordan quietly walked into Dru's room and lightly started shaking Dru's shoulder to wake her. Dru had been right though she never spoke about her inability to sleep her nightmares were getting worse. Having no one else on the ship to speak with, she might as well wake up Dru. "Dru?" She whispered softly trying not to get her face to close to Dru's.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Drusilla had only been asleep for a few hours, she'd stayed up a little late like normal. She had been awoken by her door opening. Slowly her hand gripped the pistol that was under her pillow. Yes Dru sleeps with a gun, when you're a mercenary you tend to do things like that. Sleep is one of the most vulnerable times, best to be prepared.

The footsteps were light and quiet, at first she ignored the shakes of her shoulder. Until Jordan's voice spoke her name. Dru let go of the gun and rolled onto her back, looking up at the mechanic. "What's wrong?" She didn't sound sluggish or sleepy, she had been wide awake since the door had opened. Dru sat up in her bed as she waited for Jordan to answer.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan sighed as she looked Dru over. "I'm sorry Dru, I just..." She felt childish and foolish all of a sudden. She slowly sat down on a chair in the room and looked up at Dru. "I keep having dreams about killin' that girl." She was only telling half the story.

Jordan had dreamed she was on a ship, walking around, it was the Bjorn but there was something wrong with it. She was confused at first. She stepped over Jeff's body first, then Lars and Trace.

She walked passed Reavers in the ship, they ignored her, some grunted what she assumed was a hello. Jordan made her way into the engine room, and once there, she saw Dru, whom she killed before looking in a mirror and saw herself as a Reaver.

She had been having these dreams since she killed that woman. Normally she would busy herself, work on something, check something, however she couldn't get the dream off her mind. She needed someone to be awake with her, someone to talk to, and Dru seemed like the best bet to understand.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru watched as Jordan sat down, apologizing to her. She shook her head slightly, "No reason to be sorry." It was expected after-all, the nightmares. "Though you might want to just knock, instead of just coming in. If you hadn't said anything you would have come very up close and personal to my gun." She pulled the gun from beneath her pillow, setting it onto the small table as she spoke.

A soft smile crossed her lips, "Is there anything I can do for you? I can listen if you just need to talk." Dru moved over a little then pat her bed a couple times, motioning for Jordan to come sit if she wanted.

[Jordan Maxwell]

"You sleep with a g...." She fell silent and remember who she was speaking with, shrugging she walked over to the bed and sat down next to Dru. "At least I stopped myself before saying something completely stupid."

She smiled up at Dru then leaned back in her bed some. "My dreams have been.. more vivid since... I can't sleep Dru..." She shifted to sit up and looked at the palms of her hands. "I use to think that it was easier to just kill someone instead of talking them down, or finding another way around things.. I, I, I don't think I want to pull that trigger again... I didn't think I ever could pull it on a living creature. I guess I was really wrong about that huh?" She looked over a Dru. She knew that saving herself and Trace was the right thing to do, but she didn't wish death on that woman, or her baby.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

"Not stupid, regular folks don't normally sleep with a gun I'm sure. Just us evil folks." Dru grinned at Jordan, she was only teasing of course with the last bit.

She listened quietly as the mechanic talked, letting her say whatever might make her feel better. Sighing softly Dru put her hand over Jordan's palms so stop her from staring. "People never know how they're going to react to a life or death situation until it happens. You can suspect and run through it in your mind all you like, but it's not the same thing. What you did doesn't make you a bad person or evil in anyway, you did what you had to. Simple as that Jordan."

Dru really didn't know what she could say to help the girl's feelings. She would probably have to just deal with it in her own way, in her own time. The mercenary could try though, to offer words that may help. Even if just a little.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan looked over to Dru and smiled a little as she lightly took hold of her hand. "I suppose you are right, I just... I don't know why I feel so guilty." She fell silent again before continued speaking. "Dru, I think its the baby..." She was referring to what was bothering her.

"I guess I have always equated the killing of babies.." She stopped and recalled something Dru said. "You're not evil.."

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru let Jordan hold onto her hand without any fuss, "Well that was the first person, or anything that died by your hand Jordan. To be quite honest your reaction is normal. Even I had a bit of trouble after making my first kill." Granted Dru had only taken a week if that to get over it, after that it got easier. Until a mark was just another faceless body to the mercenary.

"You can always think of it like this; the environment of pirates isn't one for a child to grow up in. In a way you saved it from that life." It probably wasn't the best thing to say, but it was reality. The truth of it, and Dru was a fan of the truth without much else mattering about it.

"Oh I'm not? If I do recall our previous conversation about that, I am indeed evil because I was on the wrong side. Except that what I do now is somehow better because it's honest."

[Jordan Maxwell]

"I take that back, I don't think you could ever be counted as evil, just confused on which side was the right one." She smiled at Dru again and for a moment, thought about kissing her. She turned away blushing and looked back at Dru's hand. Jordan's thumb rubbed the side of Dru's hand lightly.

"Perhaps you are right Dru.. I will have to think about it more." She glanced back at Dru but refused to look her in the eyes.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru grinned at Jordan's words, "So I'm not evil anymore, well I'm not good either. I guess that makes me neutral? As far as sides, I've never been on anyone's side but my own."

Confusion struck the mercenary then, Jordan was blushing again. It wasn't the first time she'd done so when Dru was near. "Now that isn't the first time you've done that, the blushing. What's the deal there?"

Her words about the pirates, the girl, the child; seemed to had done at least a little good for the mechanic. Dru nodded, "There's no need to grieve for her Jordan, you didn't know her. She was a threat to you, not a friend." The girl didn't deserve any thoughts going in her direction, she deserved that bullet that Jordan put into her.

[Jordan Maxwell]

Jordan smiled but kept looking down. "Well, we are all a team now, family of sorts, so, we are together on the same side..." She tried her best to avoid why she was blushing, she didn't know what to say to her. She was young, and in more than one way inexperienced with both friends, and people she had a crush on. She wasn't sure how to continue.

"I just embarrassed myself," was all she could think of saying.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru shook her head slightly, "This team seems pretty fragile to me, and regardless I'm still on my own side. Which is normally along side whoever is paying the best." Money was how she functioned usually, especially since she had left the Southern Star before. Her life had turned back to her mercenary lifestyle where all that mattered was the money you were getting paid for the kill.

"Though, I suppose if I stay around long enough to get used to a crew again that will change again." Dru sighed a little.

"You're still talking in circles. You've got to make some kind of sense here Jordan, or am I just am suffering from lack of sleep right now."

[Jordan Maxwell]

"No, it's me Dru. I am tryin to figure out how I feel about everythin. I came in here to talk to you instead of talkin to Trace. He's most likely awake too, we are both havin a hard time. I am just havin a hard time.. I trust you, and you are the first person that has treated me half way right..." Jordan looked up at Dru ashamed, she was rambling on like a twit again.

"I'm not sure how to say any of this Dru... I would like you to stay as long as we are both needed here." She paused, she wasn't really getting any where, they were both tired, and half asleep. All Jordan wanted to do was just lay down with Dru in bed, she always felt safe near the woman, despite how that sounded to her. Should she act on how she was feeling now? Was this just a half asleep dream? Was this the right thing? Was she going crazy? The questions and several others ran through her head. And finally she decided her parents were dead, there was no one to shame with her actions, and she took that as a sign.

Jordan leaned in and kissed Dru's lips softly.

[Drusilla Pardieu]

Dru rubbed her eyes as Jordan went on again, making a little more sense this time. Even if not by much. Shaking her head again at the mechanic, "I'm not planning on going anywhere, not for awhile at least. Unless Lars comes to his senses about wanting me to be first-mate of this ship."

It sounded as though Jordan may have been wanting to go talk to the pilot too, which was fine. They could try and help each other cope. "If you want to go talk to Trace instead you ca--" Dru's words were cut off by Jordan's kiss. It surprised the mercenary, someone finally got the jump on her - never even saw it coming. She didn't pull away, simply sat there still for what might have been just a moment or two.

Was that why Dru had warmed up a might quicker than usual to Jordan? She had never been one for relationships, not even one nighters. Too much complication comes with emotions like that. Despite that she raised a hand to touch Jordan's cheek and returned the kiss.

[Jordan Maxwell]

As their first kiss ended Jordan leaned into Dru's hand and looked up into her eyes. She wasn't sure what to say or do. She had never had feelings like this before. She she had crushes when she was younger, even kissed a boy or two in her day. But there was something else to their relationship that she hadn't felt before. She wasn't sure if it was love, but she was sure her feelings were only deepened by what happened.

"Dru?" She asked as she watched her expression. She wanted to know if she went to far, was Dru ready for something like this? As she waited she gently played with Dru's finger tips.